Monday, July 8, 2013

Chuckleheads Unite

Given that I'll soon be back in the darkness of NoInternetLand (a constituent entity of BlackoutTopia), I thought I'd throw up a bonus post today, sharing an hilarious link that my brother sent me over Twitter: The Straight, White Dudes' Guide to Discussing Diversity.

See, the title is coldly sarcastic. If there's one group that "open" "minded," "tolerant" people nakedly despise, it is straight white men. Your humble correspondent is an insouciant member of said faction, so I'm hard-pressed to feel personally attacked by such parochial rhetoric. Nevertheless, I'm a bit miffed at the double standard: imagine if someone wrote a derisive "guide" for gay black women. Of course, the point isn't that we should be able to openly make fun of homosexual minorities, but that the brazen mocking of all heterosexual white males as a group is self-evidently stupid.

Aw, it's like yelling at a brick wall, though. I'm the enemy! Thus the guide, and its bizarre, confused advice as how how My People can avoid "earning [ourselves] a big, old eye roll." Hey, I have feelings too! Wait, dial that back a bit:

5. Not every one of your opinions is a magical snowflake.
Sometimes you really will make a valuable contribution. When you do, I know that, personally, I will be really, really thankful for it. You’ll earn yourself a place on the Mantle of Allies for engaging respectfully and offering thoughtfully. But, you also have to appreciate that we are frequently going to come at issues from different perspectives, with a different set of cultural values. Not everything you’ll suggest will work in my cultural context. Not every one of your brilliant ideas is going to be a magical snowflake, saving the world and liberating us all.

Trounced.

Actually, all of the items on the list are probably good advice for everyone, not just straight white dudes. But Dr. Isis apparently thinks women, minorities and non-heterosexuals are immune to the types of mistakes that us straight whities evidently make all the time. "Being a straight, white dude does not automatically make you an asshole," the good Doctor assures us---thank God. Just the same, we apparently need a "guide" to navigate basic human interaction. So being a straight white male just makes us stupid.

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